Be Yourself

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I had the pleasure of spending yesterday teaching yoga at a middle school in my area. I was surprised, and delighted, at what I discovered in the gym. The walls were covered with signs, made by students, that celebrated diversity and encouraged acceptance. While I wasn’t smart enough to snap a picture, lucky for me, the lovely Heather Coates was - thanks for letting me steal it.

I saw this sign yesterday – a quote that I’ve seen many times before, and thought to myself what a positive message to be sending to these kids. This is the kind of stuff that they really need to hear. Middle school (and High school – don’t get me started) can be a difficult time with everyone just trying to “fit in”. As I’ve gotten older, this pressure has definitely let up, and yesterday I was feeling pretty good when I saw this sign. I think I’m pretty happy just being myself.

Then I went to yoga this morning. About halfway into the class we were in locust pose (FYI lying on your belly, chest and legs lifted). My back has never been very bendy. With yoga, I have definitely gained more mobility through my shoulders and upper back, but locust is still a killer for me. Directly in front of me was my friend with a VERY (and I mean VERY) bendy back. As my eyes lifted and I saw her gracefully floating higher and higher as I remained stuck and stiff, I thought – I wish I had her back.

Uh-Oh…looks like I’m not so happy being myself.

We can drive ourselves crazy trying to be someone other than ourselves. I bet a lot of us could easily take a look around at the people in our lives and say hmm..I’d like to have:

Her back.
His brains.
Her hair.
Her eyes.
His car.
Her thighs.
His sense of humour.
Her confidence…

The list could go on forever and all it does it keep us unsatisfied. In that moment of comparing myself to my friend, was I happy with my pose? No. And what a waste of energy over something that means nothing – I never will have her back nor do I need her back. I have a perfectly good one strapped to my body right now.

I am taking the advice from the wall of the middle school. If there is a part of your life where you are wanting to be more like someone else (and if you can’t think of something…dig deeper) – I suggest you do too.

Yoga and Transformation

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OK I’ll just say it. I’m sorry. I realize that I have neglected my little blog for the past week or two, but with good reason – I was busy hanging out here:

Wouldn’t you neglect your blog too?

My intention was to write while I was in South Carolina, until I got there and fell head over heels in love with the place. I couldn’t justify sitting on my computer when I could be out soaking in the low country and enjoying some family time.

One thing I am also deeply in love with is yoga (in case you didn’t realize). I definitely didn’t fall instantly, but when I finally did, I fell hard. It is often said that whatever you need from yoga, you will get. The practice peels away those extra layers (fat, emotional baggage, tension) that we all seem to carry around. Instead of trying to convince you how, I figured I would just show you.

This video has taken the yoga world by storm. It has been all over the place and now here it is – from me to you! If this isn’t inspiring, I don’t know what is.

Follow Your Heart.

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I always feel inspired when I read these words by the amazing Steve Jobs. He really had a gift for putting things into perspective. We can spend our whole life shying away from what we really want because our fear of failure takes us out.

What do you really want in life?

What fear is holding you back?

Drop it and follow your heart.

XO

Rain Rain Go Away

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Rain Rain go away
Come again another day never.

It’s a nasty day out people. I’m sure that’s not breaking news to those of you that live in my area, but just in case you are reading this from BC (Hi Pat!), I thought I would give you a visual.

Cold. Wet. Rainy. Blah.

My mood has always seemed to be directly related to the weather.
Sunny? It’s a great day. I’m full of energy. The world is at my fingertips.
Rainy? Not so much. I’m tired. I’m lazy. In a perfect world I would be curling up in bed with a good book, a cup of tea and about to fall into a nice deep sleep. Imagine how great the world would be if they declared all rainy days a day of hibernation. No work. No chores. Just sleep. Ahhh.

Reality check: we don’t live in a perfect world. Despite rainy days and storms, life goes on, whether we go with it or not. In the last few years I’ve realized just how deeply affected I am by the weather (silly, I know, but very true). Moving into the winter, with shorter daylight hours, my energy plummets. There are reasons for this, a main one being a lack of sunshine and Vitamin D. But during the summer – I have no excuse. A rainy day shouldn’t mean a grumpy Jenn and quite frankly I am sick of letting the weather control my mood. It’s a terrible way to live.

Can I let weather sway my mood? Yes…in fact I have for a very long time. But as with all habits, the time comes when we make a choice to drop them…when they simply don’t fit anymore. I’m sick of letting outside circumstances (especially something as unpredictable as the weather) control my experience of life. So I have a choice. I can let it, or I can move past it.

If you have energy issues, mood issues or just feel crappy on nasty days, realize that you have a choice. We create our own experience. Choose to find pleasure and joy in the little things today, regardless of what is happening outside your window.

As for me – I’m holed up at the studio for the day and making a choice. Instead of wishing today away because it’s a little wet outside, I’m going to embrace the coziness of this couch, my hot cup of tea, and the rain pounding outside.

Stay warm! Stay dry! Xo

Earth Day

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Happy Earth Day!


While Earth Day has been around since 1970, it was in 2009 that the United Nations designated April 22 International Mother Earth Day.

My day started suddenly (at 8 AM…on a Sunday), when I awoke to a loud noise vibrating through my house. When I finally dragged myself out of bed to investigate, I realized the noise was coming from our fireplace. A little bird perched on top of our chimney was looking for a nest. Every 30 seconds, it would slam its beak down into our chimney cap and drill away, hoping to break through and find a nice little place to call home.

I immediately blamed the bird for ruining my one chance this week to actually sleep in. How rude! Then I started running several scenarios through my head. How could I get rid of this guy?

Suddenly, I remembered all the hype about this Sunday being Earth Day. Uh-Oh. Not so Earthy on my part (or yoga-like for that matter). My morning brought me face-to-face with how entitled I feel when it comes to the environment. Too many of us walk around with this feeling like we own the world and can do as we want with it. Very rarely in my daily life do I think about what a limited resource and amazing gift the Earth is.

I plan to take small steps this week to reduce my ecological footprint and I invite you to do the same. I will NOT forget my stainless steel water bottle when I leave for the studio tomorrow. Far too often, I run out of the house without it and because it’s convenient and I need water, grab a plastic bottle (bad yogi – I know).

Not anymore!

What can you do this week to be kind to good ol’ Mother Earth?

*To my little birdy friend. I am happy to share with you, but please, if you could just pick one of the trees in my backyard to build your nest, then we could all get some sleep*

Give Yourself a Break

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I tend to live my life in overdrive. I am constantly pushing forward, moving on to the next thing, thinking about where I SHOULD be instead of focusing on where I actually am. I choose to focus on the future – where I need to go, who I need to be, what I need to see, and what I need to get to be a “successful” person. I know for a fact I’m not alone here. I’ve heard many people open up about how difficult they find it to be happy with where they are. We seem to be programmed to move through life three (maybe five or ten for some of you) steps ahead of ourselves…always thinking about what we need to accomplish down the road to move forward.

What is it that has all of us fools running around in overdrive?

I believe that it’s that little voice in our head that I spoke about earlier this week. Remember, the one that tells us we aren’t good enough, we haven’t done enough, we haven’t seen enough and we don’t have enough. So we operate from a place of trying to prove something.

To who?
Ourselves. We create it. We place all of this pressure and all of these expectations on ourselves and then walk around with a massive weight on our shoulders.

Not my idea of fun.

Let me clarify something here. I am by no means saying that having goals and dreams is a bad thing. It’s obviously important to have some direction in life, some idea of where you want to go. But when our expectations, dreams and goals take away from our ability to appreciate where we are, we run into a bit of a problem. This “problem” tends to come up for me A LOT. It’s something that my Mom teases me about often. I start rambling about how I’m not published, I’m not a studio owner, I’m not this and I’m not that and she’s stuck there trying to remind me that I’m in a good place and I’ve accomplished a lot.

Given our history around this subject, she had a pretty good laugh when I got home from teaching this week and had her read this (I just so happened to stumble upon this random page at the end of a class):

Give Yourself a Break

Learn to appreciate yourself and others.

Knowing we desire growth and improvement is one thing. constantly driving ourselves and others is another. Maybe the answer isn’t that we need to do better, try harder, push more. Maybe the answer is recognizing and appreciating how well we already do things. How hard we try. How much we have done. How well others are doing, too.

Pushing ourselves can become so habitual that we deny ourselves any feeling of satisfaction. No matter how well or how much we do, the urge to try harder, do better, do more keeps pushing us on. It doesn’t let us rest. We still feel it isn’t quite good enough.

If you’ve been pushing yourself that hard, you may need more than a coffee break. Take a real break. Give yourself permission to put that drive aside. Quiet that part of you that wants to do more, be more, accomplish more. Learn to value how well you do things, even if no one else sees or appreciates your efforts. Applaud your own efforts of those you love. For today and for one week, instead of demanding more from yourself, tell yourself how well you’ve done. For today and for one week, instead of demanding more from those around you, tell them that they are doing well, too.

Tell yourself how well you do. You may discover you’re doing better than you thought.

Journey to the Heart
Melody Beattie

What really resonated for me is that pushing forward can become such a habit, we deny ourselves any feeling of satisfaction. When I was in teacher training, I was focused on graduating. When I graduated, I was focused on getting a class. When I got a class, I was focused on getting a second class. Not once did I stop to really celebrate my accomplishments because as soon as they happened, I was already on to the next step.

Can you see where pressure and expectation are running your life? There is a fine line between being motivated to achieve your goals versus constantly pushing yourself to be more because you don’t feel that you are enough right now. Notice when you are operating from that place of pushing, trying, forcing and just STOP. Appreciate where you are, celebrate how far you’ve come and then move forward with gratitude and confidence.

All of this talk about celebrating accomplishments made me realize that I graduated teacher training a year ago this week. I think this calls for a nice glass of pinot.

Time to take a break…I hope you take yours too!

Happy Friday xo

The “Secret” to Writing

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“The secret of becoming a writer is to write, write, and keep on writing”

- Ken MacLeod

I will never forget a moment in my last year of university when a professor stood at the front of the room and asked “Who in this room would call themselves a writer?”. A few hands were raised. Mine remained glued to the table.

Me?
A writer?
No. I don’t have anything published. I don’t have a blog. I have never been paid to write.
I had this issue with calling myself a writer, meanwhile I was just wrapping up my fourth year in a media program with a certificate in writing.

Since then, I have been trying to figure out the “secret” to becoming a writer. Will I be a writer when I start a blog? When I get something published? When I get a paid position? When I write a book? In the last week, I realized the “secret” to being a writer is, quite simply, to write. Establishing a routine and writing even when you feel you have nothing to write about. I’ve decided to take small steps towards calling myself a “writer” (whatever that means anyways). I have been sitting around for years waiting and hoping to get something published. Setting up this blog a few months ago was the first step. Making a commitment to writing regularly, the second. Now, only three days into this commitment I’ve hit my first speed bump. I’m busy, I’m tired and wasn’t really sure what to write about. So, I’m writing from where I am right now – a little bit stuck, but writing regardless. Success!

Do You Want to be Happy?

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The highest spiritual path is life itself. If you know how to live daily life, it all becomes a liberating experience. But first you have to approach life properly, or it can be very confusing. To begin with, you have to realize that you really only have one choice in this life, and it’s not about your career, whom you want to marry, or whether you want to seek God. People tend to burden themselves with so many choices. But, in the end, you can throw it all away and just make one basic, underlying decision: Do you want to be happy, or do you not want to be happy? It’s really that simple. Once you make that choice, your path through life becomes totally clear.

- The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself

I’m a sucker for quotes (typical, I know) and I plan to share my favourites with you (like it or not).

It’s funny how complicated we can make our lives. We get so bogged down in the details, the decisions, and the circumstances of our lives that we often forget to be happy. Happiness is a choice. It’s that simple. I’m not saying you choose it and then from this day forward you never feel pain or sadness again (but wouldn’t that be nice?). Choosing happiness means that at the end of the day, no matter what life threw at you, you take a second to appreciate the fact that you are breathing, your heart is beating and quite simply, you are still alive. I’m going to try to remember this the next time things get tough.

Have a great day people – be happy.

XO

My little friend self-doubt

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As a yoga student and teacher, self inquiry, transformation and journaling has become a regular part of my life. In fact, I would go as far as to say that I am actually fully addicted to this kind of thing. I have seen such amazing results in my life from participating in workshops and trainings that I can’t seem to get enough. Not a bad vice if I must say so myself. I am currently participating in a workshop, for the second time, at Power Yoga Canada called Your Life Design. Part of my homework for the week was to interview 3 people in my life. My favourite question on the list…

What about me drives you absolutely crazy?

If that’s not a fully loaded question, I don’t know what is.

It took several tries to convince my boyfriend that no, this was not some sort of trick question to get him in trouble…I actually wanted and needed an honest answer from him, all feelings aside. After enough reassurance, he let it slip.

His answer?
You doubt yourself CONSTANTLY.

My Dad’s answer?
You don’t believe in yourself.

My friend’s answer?
Self-doubt.

Hmmm. I spot a trend.
It truly fascinates me how insightful and spot on people can be if you really give them the opportunity to just be honest with you. Am I at all surprised by their answers? No. I am very aware that self-doubt creeps up on me more often than not. Am I surprised that they were all so aware of it? Yes – but I guess I can understand why.

For the last 23 years, my tactic when self-doubt starts screaming in my head is to run to the person I am closest to and ask for reassurance. I explain how there is this really awesome thing that I want to do but I obviously could never ever ever do it. And then I wait. I wait for that reassurance that yes, of course I can do it. And all of a sudden I feel better, at least for the moment, that maybe this thing or this idea is in fact possible. Effective? Maybe temporarily but the results don’t last and then sure enough, there I am again, waiting. Asking them if they could possibly just repeat that thing they said to me last week, last month or last year, just ONE more time. And then they build me up again.

It’s a dangerous cycle and one that clearly drives the people in my life a little crazy. To my friends, family and boyfriend – I’m working on it ;) .

Am I alone in this? Am I a self-doubting super freak? No, not at all. I don’t think any of you reading this can say that there has never been a time in your life where that little voice in your head has screamed or maybe just whispered “you’re not good enough”, “you can’t do that“, “don’t even bother trying“. Self-doubt is everywhere. It can control every single aspect of our lives if we let it.

Last night I came to an important realization. I have to stop relying so heavily on the people around me to build me up and inspire me to follow my dreams. I need to become my own generator and the only way to do this is to fully believe in myself. Now, I wish I could tell you the point of this post is to outline my 5 Concrete Steps to Stepping outside of Self-Doubt and into Belief, but I don’t have those kind of answers. Trust me, if I ever do – I will post them immediately.

I think the best thing for me to do now is acknowledge when I am operating from a place of self-doubt. Then ask myself: is the fear of moving forward – the possibility of failure – scary enough to pass up the opportunity?

I’m pretty positive the answer will be no.

It’s time to tell that little voice of self-doubt in my head to just beat it.